A Culture of Dependence

There's no question that the social community supporting Humans of New York is overwhelmingly kind and compassionate and there's no question that I'm not an economist. How do these two topics relate? It's not conventional and may not be deemed the "nicest" of ideas but hear me out. Here's some quick food for thought.

To be completely, completely honest, I have never been that excited about the idea of college. Unlike most of my friends, the freedom of college and moving away from home was not all that thrilling because one, I wasn't planning on doing anything risky with this newfound freedom (god forbid I go out to party and drink) and two, at the end of the day, it's just more school. The one part of college that I was very much looking forward to however, was studying abroad. 

You see, I've always believed that if you had a job that directly helped others, you would never regret going to work. Even on the worst work days, you will have some kind of positive influence on another person's life and how could you ever regret that?

And that is why I decided to become a doctor.

Just kidding.

(Long story short the process of becoming of doctor requires more school and plus, I have an innate fear of chemistry)

And that is why I decided to major in engineering. 

(Still has some chemistry, but not as much.)

With enginering I knew that during my four years in college, I'll have the chance to travel to some far away, less fortunate country, immerse myself in a completely new environment, and help engineer waterways, wells, bridges, whatever and get to do that something good. 

But now I'm not sure if I want to travel abroad because if you think about it a little more deeply from my un-professional, self-proclaimed profession, economic point of view, this idea of charity, donations, volunteering, maybe be a little bit....selfish? 

As citizens of a well-to-do world power, we inevitably see ourselves as superior to our third-world country counterparts. When we see pictures of starving children, impoverished villages with no electricity, nations torn by war, by disease, we have a very human instinct to help. And a lot of times when we travel cross seas to help, we pity the people we are helping. Because they don't have as much as us, because we see them as in need of our help, because sometimes, when we see their different lifestyles, we think their lives are not as good as ours. But who are we to judge the lives of others? To envade their culture and label it as in need of help? To march in with our superior complex and say this, this, and this needs to be changed? Because the bottom line is, philanthropy is not about helping out of pity, it is about aiding through respect. 

"Aiding" being the key word here. Because unfortunately, philanthropy, traveling to another country to build a bridge or a well can create this concept called "a culture of dependence". When we blatantly give material goods or build infrastructure, we do good yes, but what about in the long run? What if the goods were stolen? What if the infrastructure falls apart? Do the people wait for another altruistic group of volunteers to come to the rescue and bring more goods? Build more infrastructure?

Charity, humanitarian work, volunteering, should be based on the end goal of building independence for those who need aid. Otherwise what we ultimately create is a perpetual, never-ending cycle of dependence.

Which brings me to this week’s Humans of New York photo:

“My mother and I lost our apartment when the landlord raised the rent. She went to live in my aunt’s attic in New Jersey, but there were too many stairs there, so I had to go to the homeless shelter. Most of the people at the shelter have addiction problems and mental issues. I’m living with people that I never thought I’d have to live with. The M35 is the only bus that goes to the shelter. Disabled people are supposed to get on first. But as soon as it gets to the stop, everyone rushes in until it’s full, and the bus driver is too intimidated to say anything. A lot of times it leaves without me.”

So naturally the good-hearted Facebook community immediately rushes to his aid, offering to raise money for the man. Brandon Stanton's comment on this picture? "The man in the photo has requested that funds not be raised for him. He is in the process of finding a place with his brothers and would like to figure out his living situation on his own, but he thanks everyone so much for their well wishes and thoughts."

So maybe it's not about helping others at all. It's about aiding them, supporting them, and allowing them to help themselves.